What Love Really Means

     I found this song a few months ago on my way to work listening to the radio. I was only able to hear a couple lines of the song before I arrived at work, but I had already been touched and had decided I was going to buy the song

P.S. If you're on a mobile device, for whatever reason, the video may not show up. Click here to visit youtube to view the video.

 

"What Love Really Means"

He cries in the corner where nobody sees
He's the kid with the story
No one would believe
He prays every night
"Dear God won't you please
Could you send someone here
Who will love me?"

Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done
Or what I will become
Who will love me for me
'Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means

Her office is shrinking a little each day
She's the woman whose husband has run away
She'll go to the gym after working today
Maybe if she was thinner
Then he would've stayed
And she says...
Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done
Or what I will become
Who will love me for me
'Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means
What love really means

He's waiting to die as he sits all alone
He's a man in a cell who regrets what he's done
He utters a cry from the depths of his soul
"Oh Lord, forgive me, I want to go home"

Then he heard a voice somewhere deep inside
And it said,
"I know you've murdered and I know you've lied
And I have watched you suffer all of your life
And now that you'll listen I'll, I'll tell you that I..."

I will love you for you
Not for what you have done
Or what you will become
I will love you for you
I will give you the love
The love that you never knew
Love you for you
Not for what you have done
Or what you will become
I will love you for you
I will give you the love
The love that you never knew

 

 



     What Love Really Means is composed of 3 stories; of a young boy who has already lived a hard life, a woman who recently lost her husband, and a convict who's awaiting the death penalty.
     There are many reasons I love this song, one of the most prominent being that I relate to each story. I also love the message sent through the song about the importance of not judging others, and even more so, the infinite love Jesus Christ has for each of us.
     The first story of the boy really speaks to my young self. As a child, I was bullied and made fun of. I was an easy target because I was different than everyone else. It was easy for me to be friends with girls, and I had a hard time talking to guys. I was shy, emotional, awkward, and sometimes just plain weird. Confusing and hurtful things were done and said to me. Boys scared me. I had been betrayed, rejected, hurt, and abused. I used to cry to God to send me someone who could love me & be a friend to me. My prayer was answered and I was given a best friend.
      She and I had a lot of fun together, and when we were hanging out, we didn't worry about what others' thought. We were best friends, we did most everything together, and were as weird as we wanted to be. Part of me, however, still needed something more. I longed for a male in whom I could trust and love as a best friend. It wasn't until much later in my life, when I was 18, that God truly answered that prayer, and when He did, I was answered with an avalanche of blessings and changes.
     The second story, of the woman, spoke to me regarding the rejection I had experienced in life, and the mask I used to wear. It touched me regarding my body image issues and self-worth. Sometimes I don't feel good enough. Something happens in my life and I look inward and try to determine what I did wrong, even if it wasn't my fault. I beat myself up, try to change things I can't change about myself, and sometimes I wish I was someone else. "Maybe if I was thinner, better-looking, kinder, stronger, heterosexual, not an addict, etc. then they would've stayed. Then life would be easier, then I would love myself."
     If I could understand that to Christ, those aren't qualities that qualify me for love, that the people who really matter in my life lift me up and love me, not tear me down and judge me, and that I need to be a good friend to myself. I often put up a mask to make people think I was someone I wasn't. People used to ask me if I was "gay", to which I would quickly and sharply say "No!, Gross, Never, etc.". I was ignorant, I was a liar, I was scared. I used to be the nicest, quietest, most obedient person on the outside, which I'm not saying the nice and obedient part is bad, but I'd get into trouble behind the scenes, and when someone found out, I would deny my involvement, and the blame would be passed on someone else because adults didn't believe someone so "well-behaved" and "respectful" could ever do something wrong.
     And the final story of the convicted man awaiting the death penalty. I loved this one because it truly highlighted someone at their lowest point, at their 'rock-bottom'. In the lowest moment, the man in the story opened his heart to be touched by the Savior. In his lowest moment, knowing what would soon come to pass, he longed to feel loved, he wanted to go home. Our real home. Living with our Heavenly Father. "When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change." -Avatar Aang

     I remember my lowest point, when I was absolutely broken inside. I couldn't rely on my own will-power anymore, I had to somewhere else, to someone else. Someone whose strength and love was infinite. I had to turn to God and Christ. Though I would continue to fall and make mistakes through life, Christ would be there to pick me up, hold me, and guide me through this life. He would love me and forgive me, even when I made mistakes, even when I made big mistakes. He could show me What Love Really Means.

     Just today while I was on my way to lunch during work, I was listening to one of my favorite radio stations, and I was reminded of His love, and the importance of forgiving others. What I got from it: If I'm a believer, I have to forgive, no matter what, no matter who. I'm just as guilty no matter what someone does to me. I need to forgive myself too. Christ forgave His murderers, Christ forgave us all.

     If there's a story you feel you connect to, feel free to share it in the comments! I think interaction would be fun, that is if you'd like to post a comment ;) Love you all!

    



What do I Mean to You?

     I want to talk about something today, something that has been run through the news and media, been the topic of political decisions, had lots of attention in the courts, and been a subject of conversation among certain people, and it is the subject of same-sex (gay) marriage. I want to talk about it today because it has been ever present in the world around me, and today I've decided to take a different approach on it. This post will be controversial, this post will be direct and from my heart. I will do my best to be kind, careful, and aware of others' needs and feelings, but I can't make any promises.

     I wanted to write somewhat in the form of a letter. A letter addressed to everyone (as everyone is affected in some way by this topic) but most especially to people of authority over others, people who advocate or are on the fence about advocating for gay marriage, and anyone and everyone else it may concern.

     Dear sons and daughters of God,

     I have something on my mind I need to get out and explain from my own personal standpoint and experience. Over and over I hear gay marriage brought up all over the news, all over public and social forums and communities, and strewn over various other media and social situations and sources. It is something that, despite my stance on it, does still affect me greatly.

     How, you may ask? Or perhaps you know how. It affects me because whether you realize it or not, you have an influence on me, but even more important to know, you have a big influence and impact on every single person who hears about it, and especially those who deal with SSA or who know someone directly who deals with it. You may not realize it, but your decision to advocate for or against marriage equality may greatly affect someone's choice to advocate for it themselves, or even affect their life choices. Maybe your choices and actions were the driving hit that sank the wedge into their decision regarding it, for good or bad.

     Now do people still have free agency? Of course! And God recognizes that. Blame for another persons actions can not be pressed in full against you. Everyone, no matter who or in what circumstances, has free agency and will. However, outside forces, including and especially peers and authoritative figures can have a great impact on one's thoughts and choices.

     What I want you to know is that if you are a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, or even if you're not, and you advocate for marriage equality, you affect me, you hurt me. The sad thing is that many LDS advocators for marriage equality are in direct contact with someone who has SSA, and as a result, they have a strong influence on how said person thinks and feels. Again, I emphasize free agency, but there can always be influence to choice.

     One thing I've learned in life is that there is a difference between enabling love, and true love. Enabling love is when you care more about how someone feels about you, or how you perceive they will feel, than who they are as a person and what they actually deserve. It means you put the way they treat you above their own well-being. For example, I learned about this in my treatment center. There were drug addicts there who talked about their "friends" who would sell them drugs, and that in that way, their "friends" "loved" them. Selling drugs to an addict is not love, it is enabling them to pain, suffering, destruction, and in some cases death. If someone asked you to go against what you know to be right in order to show them that you "love" them, would you? Or would you realize your salvation, as well as theirs is more important than worldly respect or "love"?

     True love, on the other hand, means that you love someone enough that you put their well-being above all else. My parents, for example, loved me so much that they sent me to inpatient treatment. It was a very hard decision for them, and a very very hard thing for me, but my parents did it to keep me safe. They did it because even though I was very upset with them, they knew it would help me and save me.

     Christ is the ultimate example of true love and real friendship. True friends to not let you continue in bad behavior, they do not enable you. Christ does not enable anyone to make bad decisions. No, He does not take our free agency, but He shows us the way and teaches us to improve our lives and choices.

     Anyway, I'm getting a little off topic. Back to my letter. 

     I want to emphasize as well the devastating effect you can have if you aggressively and cruelly oppose gay marriage. I personally oppose it, and I myself have SSA. What I mean, however, are the people who dehumanize, demonize, and attack gays and lesbians because of it. I personally have been hurt by ignorant comments from people towards gays. Making fun of someone is never ok. Being cruel and needlessly angry and offensive/defensive is not a good choice either. Be cautious of your words and actions, but don't let caution override truth. Do not deny the truth in a moment of fear or pressure. 

     As is the story of Peter the apostle in Matthew 26, "69 Now Peter sat without in the palace: and a damsel came into him, saying, Thou also wast with Jesus of Galilee.

70 But he denied before them all, saying, I know not what thou sayest.

71 And when he was gone out to the porch, another maid saw him, and said unto them that were there, This fellow was also with Jesus of Nazareth.

72 And again he denied with an oath, I do not know the man.

73 And after a while came unto him they that stood by, and said to Peter, Surely thou also art one of them; for the speech bewrayeth thee.

74 Then began he to curse and swear, saying, I know not the man. And immediately the cock crew.

75 And Peter remembered the word of Jesus, which said unto him, Before the cock crew, thou shalt deny me thrice. And he went out, and wept bitterly."

     I know I have been guilty before of denying truth. Denying what God has given me, and my faith in Him because I feared the judgement of others. Luckily that isn't often the case for me anymore. I've been able to find confidence in standing as a witness of Christ and His teachings.

     I recognize that everyone has free agency, that what I say/write may have little to no affect on you or your choices and beliefs. What I hope to accomplish in this post is to open eyes to the affect you can have on others even if you don't realize it. We all have a responsibility to love those around us, not with enabling or conditional love, but with true and righteous love turning always to the Savior. Christ's law WILL NOT change, and allowing people to more freely break His eternal law is not right, is not love, and is not fair to those you influence. 

     True love; pointing others to truth and righteousness, is what we should be showing to everyone we come in contact with.

     I'm definitely far from perfect, but I'm trying to improve and learn. I'm trying each day to be more Christlike. 

     With love, prayers, and hope; a young son of God who hopes to influence others for better,

          -Mitchell C.

Just one more thing I want to note: while I appose gay marriage, I do not hate those who advocate for it, nor do I hate or show disrespect to people in same-sex relationships. I love them as fellow sons and daughters of God, and I mourn for them in their trials and pray that they may find happiness and truth.

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Beauty in the Unknown

     There has been a lot I've learned these past few weeks. Things I've learned about myself, things I've learned about others, things I've learned about God and my relationship with him.

     One things, which to a degree I knew before, but hadn't really had it hit me as hard as it did this week is that I accepted this life, knowing I would have trials, maybe even knowing I'd have these specific trials I face. I knew to a degree what I would potentially face, and I accepted it. I willingly came here because I followed God's plan in the pre-mortal life. I fought in the war in Heaven. I earned my place here on this earth.

     I might just be all over the place in this post, so I apologize, but I want to delve into a topic that was brought up in this months' CES fireside with Brother Russell T. Osguthorpe. He had a lot of great things he talked about during the fireside, but for now I just want to focus on one specific thing he spoke about; agency. There was a lot he shared about agency, in fact it seemed to be the main topic of the fireside. One thing he said that particularly struck me, that we do have agency, we do have will. We can change our desires, our very nature, through the healing power of Christ. But I had questions rise after he said this. What did he mean? Did it apply to same-sex attraction as well? Could it really be changed? Should it?
     As I sat there in deep thought, questioning what he meant, something clicked inside my brain. I've known and accepted for some time now that same-sex attraction is very likely something I will deal with for a long time, probably my entire life, but maybe.... maybe what he meant was a slow process. Not an all at once *boom* you're changed. Maybe not even a full change in this life, just a "lessening". I started thinking of it more from an addict point of view. That does not mean that I'm comparing same-sex attraction to an addiction. Let me try to explain...
     I know heterosexual people (AKA "straight") who are sex addicts. They see a good looking person of the opposite sex, and almost immediately an unclean thought can pop into their head. Then they have to choose to dismiss the thought, or entertain it. I can see a good-looking guy (trust me, it happens), but I can choose not to objectify him. I can choose where I take my thoughts.
     Going off that same topic, I've seen people, heterosexuals, feel a lessening in their attraction through the healing power of Christ and trusting in Him. Does that mean they aren't attracted to the opposite sex anymore? No. Does it mean their attractions just displace, and suddenly they're attracted to the same-sex? Definitely not. They still have attractions to the opposite sex, but their ability to cope, their wandering eyes and risky thoughts become less and less frequent, and when they do resurface, they're easier to conquer. It's like the scripture Ether 12:27 27 "And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them."
     Maybe it's not a matter of losing the attraction, losing the addiction, losing the behaviors, whatever the trial may be; perhaps it's a matter of trusting in God and Christ to make that which is weak into a strength. I know that for me, my same-sex attraction has, in so many ways, gone from a huge weakness to a huge strength. A great blessing I am eternally thankful for. my same-sex attraction once caused me to question the worth of my life, caused me to question God's love for me, I questioned my worth to others. Now, however, I realize I am worth more than I could ever comprehend here on this earth. My same-sex attraction allows me to love and empathize with people in ways few people can. I am able to be humbled more so than I would be without it. I know my Savior in ways some people don't while here on this earth. What was once a curse, a weakness, is now a blessing, a weakness, that I rejoice in God for.
     Does it come with hardship still? Sure! I have accepted that I cannot be with a man romantically if I desire true happiness, and sometimes that can be hard, though ultimately I am happier without romance with the same-sex. I still deal with rejection and exclusion. There are still people who do not understand and do not accept me or others like me. I deal with pressure from others, even members who claim to be "active and faithful" in the Gospel, to just live out life following my desires. To get with a guy. That's one thing that appalls me: people who claim to be active, faithful, God-fearing members, yet actively seek to lead people astray. That openly and actively oppose such an important teaching of the Church and God, the institution of the family. True love is not enabling, but pushing others in a loving and Christ-like manner to repentance and truth. But that's a topic for later. Point is, I still have struggles.
     As a very wise Apostle once said: "Doubt your doubts, before you doubt your faith." -Dieter F. Uchtdorf



     Ultimately I truly know God loves me. I know I have divine potential. I know I have worth. Christ's love is eternal, the atonement never ends. I truly love you all, and I know Christ loves you all perfectly. God bless you continually!

Pain

     I realized something yesterday. Something a little scary to me. I have depression. I was diagnosed when I was 15. I've been on anti-depressants since said time. Well, I forgot to take my medicine yesterday, and was already having a hard week anyway. It seems like me missing my pill sent me on a emotional spiral downwards.

     I've gone through "episodes" like that before, so it's nothing too new for me, but this time really shocked me because of how quick I seemed to turn. Though I had been having a hard week already, yesterday threw me completely out of whack. I got extremely hopeless, depressed, and lonely. I ended up resorting to one of my old addictions, self-harming.

     Self-harming has been one of the hardest addictions for me to talk with others about. It seems almost everyone I've ever opened up to about it just tells me I have issues and just need to stop. I've been told I do it for attention, that I'm disturbed for doing it, that I'm unbalanced and need help. I will admit, when I first started self-harming it was for attention, but even so, there were other reasons behind it.

     I do not want anyone who has never self-harmed before to ever try it. It may not seem like it, but it can easily become addicting. It offers the body a physical release, and causes the body to react by releasing hormones which in many ways can act almost like drugs. Self-harming is not something I'm proud of, it's not something I want to continue to indulge in, but it's still a struggle I personally face.

     I guess my hope in writing this post is to help people realize that we all have different struggles. The best way to help anyone is just to love them. Love without judging them, but at the same time trying to turn them to God and following His commandments.

     I woke up this morning feeling monumentally better than i did yesterday. I questioned why I ever decided to harm myself yesterday, why I was even feeling so low, and I just have to realize that life happens. I have my bad days, as does everyone. I make mistakes, I sin, I'm imperfect, but I can get back up again. Life isn't over, Christ loves me infinitely and unconditionally, and He can forgive me for my shortcomings and mistakes.

     I love you all, and hope to start posting more often (and more positively while still keeping it genuine). May God bless you continually!

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Inundation

     Well, it has been some time since I've been on here. I feel the need to get on and write this post, not because I want to, but because I feel I need to. Life recently hasn't been easy, but really, life is rarely easy.
     Many feelings I am all too familiar with are coming back into my life causing me to question. Not question my beliefs, not question the existence of God, or even my testimony, but causing me to question myself. Question my worth, my ability, my shortcomings, my failures in contrast to successes, etc.
     There's a lot of pressure on me right now. I'm starting a new job next week (which I'm excited but nervous for), my Voice(s) of Hope video and essay are due to be published soon, I'm almost always packed each day with stuff I need to do (chores, family time, etc.), I've been spending a lot of time with friends, I recently joined a YSA ward and am now a home teacher so I have responsibility to work with my companion and go out and teach our members each month, etc. Many of these things are good things, things that bring me joy, happiness, and blessings. Things that bring me closer to God. Yet I'm still stressed.
     Sometimes I just don't know if I'm doing all I can. This week has seemed to highlight my shortcomings. I've been reminded of how terrible I am at standing up for myself, and even standing up for others. It seems every time I've tried I either haven't been able to, or I do, but end up being too harsh or unnecessarily defensive and end up hurting others as well as myself. Standing up for myself has been a life-long struggle. I was bullied basically my entire school career. People always told me I just needed to stand up for myself, and that I was bullied because I reacted too much. Well, whenever I tried standing up for myself I'd cross the line and get in trouble with someone. I never hit anyone, never used physical force, but my words and actions were often what caused so much pain and heart ache for those around me and to myself.
     It's something I've beat myself up for time and time again, the innate ability I seem to have to hurt those around me that I never meant to hurt, and hurt them far beyond what I ever intended. I remember back to my childhood dealing with this as well. I would always find a way to do something wrong, to hurt someone in some way even if it was a complete accident. I broke expensive decorations while playing with my friends, broke a baby doll my neighbors had which was given to them by their grandmother before she passed, I gave bruises to people I was just trying to tickle or tease, I made people cry, I influenced others to make poor decisions and then hid in the background as they took all the blame. Most all of what happened causing damage and pain was accidental, yet still I look at myself trying to figure out why it seems to happen all the time.
     I lose contact with people too easily sometimes. It's not that I stop caring about that, or even that I forget about them, we just seem to drift apart. I don't text someone for a week and it's like they've fallen out of my life completely unless I see them in my weekly life at Church or work. I feel like I'm either too overbearing, or not there for them at all. I go through phases with people. It seems to go from acquaintances to friends and sometimes to best friends, then back to friends and eventually to acquaintances, and sometimes to almost strangers again.
     Well, there are the struggles I've been facing recently. I didn't mean to make this post into a venting session, or a pity-party. All things considered, life is great, it really is. I just have things which have come up that I now need to work through and process. What can I say? I'm human and imperfect, but I'm trying.

     Now I'll try to focus on more of the positives.
     I went to my 12-step meeting (aka ARP) tonight. We were working on step 3. There was one sentence in there that stuck out to me; "You may not be able to change some things in your life, but you can change your willingness to trust in God and obey Him." That really hit me, considering all that is going on right now. There are things going on in my life, even things about myself, that I can't change, but I still need to trust on God and obey His commandments.
     I published the Voices of Hope promo video which featured me, and the feedback I got was incredible. People I haven't talked to in years send me comments and messages thanking me for touching their lives and being willing to be open and vulnerable to share my experiences, faith, and hope with the world. It wasn't even my personal video, just a video I was featured in, and yet I touched lives. It was so great and comforting to see that God was able to use me to help others. I'm a little nervous now for when my actual video is released ;)
     And now my writing ability is starting to fade. Maybe I'm just tired or lazy, I don't know. Anyway, just want to end on a positive note. Life really is amazing, even for me right now, though it seems hard. God loves EVERYONE. Every single human being on this earth is loved by Him beyond worldly comprehension. I know God has blessed me, and is still a part of my life, even if I struggle, even if I fall.
     I have a testimony that I cannot deny of Jesus Christ, and that He atoned for everyone's sins, even mine. I know that God is real, and loves everyone. I know that there is life after death, and that true happiness is found only through following God and relying on Christ. I know that Christ is the Savior of the world, and that I am loved infinitely, as everyone is.
     Love you all! May we find Light in the darkness

Voice(s) of Hope Promo Video

     Well, first off I haven't posted on here for quite a while. Life has presented all sorts of things to keep me busy and on my toes. New job, new responsibilities, family and friend activities, etc. It has been enjoyable, definitely, but exhausting nonetheless.
     The Voices of Hope project recently released a promo video, which I was featured in. To be honest, I didn't know I was going to be featured in it, but I feel so blessed that I had the opportunity to be. I definitely owe the credit to my friends and family who have guided me along this journey of life, and most especially to God who has been there to help me through every situation.
     Well, here it is;

(P.S. If you're on mobile, for whatever reason, the video doesn't always show up. You can click here to visit the video directly; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omhIK1ImVQc&feature=player_embedded&noredirect=1 )

Love you all!

I Love You...

     So much for me saying I wanted to blog about this the day after my last post "Update: This Crazy Week I've Lived". Well, the past few days have presented their own form of crazy. Lots going on, not enough time to get on the computer to type. So this is why I'm finally taking care of this post today. But lucky me, I got to go through some more experiences that better prepared me to do this post.
     As stated in my last post, I've fallen for one of my best friends, and he has expressed that he shares those feelings towards me. It has been hard not to pursue a relationship with him because part of me wants that, to feel close and intimate with him beyond what a friendship can bring. There has also been a large part of me, however, that realizes that is not what I want spiritually, and it's definitely not what I want for him.
     I was thinking the other day about what would happen if I were to pursue a relationship with him. He and I had both expressed a desire to be with each other beyond friendship, but if we were to take that path, what would it bring? Where would we both be later on if we made this decision? Would I actually be happy?
     One of the biggest factors for me regarding my decision was my feelings for him. No, I don't just mean attraction or infatuation, I mean the actual love for him that I have, the part of me that sees him as a son of God, that sees the infinite potential he has, and that desires him to be happy and successful in every way. That part of me, that desire I have to see him reach the highest level of glory and happiness is what has driven my decisions. As good as it may feel to cross the line with him, either by pursuing relationship or by acting out, ultimately my desire to see both he and I reach the Celestial Kingdom is more important to me than mortal gratification.
     I truly believe and support the teachings of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and I agree with their teachings on marriage and morality. It is because of this belief, because of the testimony and personal revelation I have received that I know the choices I'm making regarding my relationship with him is right. I have never felt the way I feel about him before, but it is because of that love that I am able to see his potential, and I am able to care about him spiritually rather than simply physically.



     I'm not trying to say it has been easy, in fact it has been very hard. It's hard to resist temptations and desires which are so strong and real. We've gotten close to crossing the line, but were able to avoid making mistakes together. It's because of these situations that we've been able to look at our friendship and reevaluate. We've both been working on boundaries in our friendship to keep one another safe. We've reached compromises and been able to take our relationship, as full of temptation and passion as it can be, and make it more healthy and spiritually fulfilling.
    It has been a process, and it's been hard. We are still working on it each day, and as painful as it can be sometimes, I've felt closer to God because of it. I've been able to open my eyes, my spiritual eyes, and see my friend as the son of God that he really is, and be able to care for him far beyond just physical and mortal matters.
    One question, concern, (whatever you'd like to call it), that has been brought up to me, and I'm sure will continue to be brought up, is why I don't just pursue a relationship with him. Why not give in? If you both love each other, is it really wrong? Who's to say the Church is correct in it's teachings? Why would God give you feelings for each other if it's wrong? And all sorts of things like that.
     My answer to all of those is that I know what is right and wrong, I have a testimony that I cannot deny, I believe in what the Church teaches, and I love my friend far more than just as an object or life-long partner. I couldn't enter a relationship with him knowing the consequences that will follow in the coming life for both of us. I just couldn't bring myself to harm him or myself like that.
     But Mitchell, if a relationship with him would bring you happiness (which to a degree, it would), why not just go for it? My answer to this question is that I have felt more love, more happiness, more fulfillment and belonging, more understanding and hope when I'm feeling the spirit, when I'm close to God, when I'm doing what I know God wants me to, when I receive a blessing, when I go to the temple, etc. than I have ever felt "fulfilling" my attractions towards the same-sex by acting out or even just considering a relationship. Even though I admittedly struggle with my spirituality at times, as I'm sure everyone does, I also know what it feels like when I am close to God, when I have those spiritual experiences. And I would not trade those for anything. I've received more fulfillment and happiness from God and living His commandments than anything this world could give me.



 

     I love you all! Storms may arise, in fact storms will arise, challenges will present themselves, doubt and fear may sink in, conflicting emotions and ideas may arise, but so long as I stick to what I know and believe, I will be ok, I will feel love and comfort in the Savior's arms.